


Seven Nights With Malachite

by BlakeLocked



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Post-Chille Tid (End of Stevenbomb 2)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-13
Updated: 2015-07-13
Packaged: 2018-04-09 01:48:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 9,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4329108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlakeLocked/pseuds/BlakeLocked
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steven promised he'd come back for her. It might take longer than he expected to make good on that one, but for now, at least Lapis doesn't have to be alone anymore. Seven nights, seven attempts to heal a repaired gem's broken heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> I got really excited about the Week of Sardonyx and wrote to quell my emotions over Lapis' situation, hoping that it might get fixed this third Stevenbomb. Here's hoping.
> 
> This is the most aggressive "I want good things to happen" fanfic I've ever written.

On the first night, Steven was nervous.

 

Or... Perhaps that wasn't quite the right word. Steven was nervous about this plan of his, certainly, willing himself back towards the mindscape through which he could communicate with Lapis. But as he slipped outside of his dream, off of Dream Lars' shoulders and into the dark void between his mind and the spiteful fusion's, and he saw the white-maned portal to Malachite's mind, Steven found himself struggling to move forward. The unhealthy fusion's mere presence was, quite frankly, terrifying. As much as he hated to admit it, Steven was scared by the sight of it alone. As he looked forward nervously at the swaying mane, the youngest of the Crystal Gems couldn't help but recall Malachite's birth – and the recollections were  _ vivid _ .

Steven remembered the beach, littered with the rubble of the Emerald Hand that had brought the Homeworld Gems to Earth – that he and the others had been forced onto, and that would've been their grave, had he not shielded them during the crash... He could remember the sight and smell of the flaming wreckage, how the sickly green flames and the pillars of smoke choked his lungs, made his eyes (one of which had already swollen up and blackened at that point) sting, how it turned the coastal scene at sunset an uncomfortable, eerie pink. He remembered the feeling of helplessness as he struggled in Amethyst’s arms at first, desperate to reach a hurt Lapis, remembered the fear he felt when he and his family had barely survived, only to meet Jasper again. Jasper the invader, the root of this mess. Steven couldn't forget the violent fury in her eyes, the way she stared at them – at he and Garnet, in particular – with such malice, the fact that even after Garnet fought her off, even after the crash, she still kept on and had the strength to wrench Lapis Lazuli out of the air...

Just the way Jasper held his friend, the way she spoke to Lapis, that mad look in Jasper's eyes as she tore her way out of the wreckage, cast in the light of the flames, all of it made Steven shiver. And that  _ grin  _ on Jasper's face when Lapis outstretched her hand, and when the fusion began? Steven still saw it when he closed his eyes, some nights. And then there was Malachite herself: Massive, brimming with hatred and frustration, and powerful. Steven hadn't forgotten how strong Lapis was, how she was able to subdue Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl so soundly, how she was able to take the  _ entire _ ocean and move it – and how even now, she kept her fusion buried under the weight of Earth's seas. Add that to Jasper's raw physical strength and... None of them could've stopped Malachite. As horrifying as it was to see Lapis drag them both under the ocean, with Malachite clawing furiously at the sands the whole way, it was a relief to know that the battle was avoided, however narrowly.

Malachite stirred, bringing Steven back into the present. The billowing white mane of the malicious fusion shifted, as though she were turning towards him. He scrambled to stay behind her as Malachite seemed to trot around in a circle. He noticed that the fusion's steps were heavy, labored, and slow – as though a heavy weight was pressing down on her back.

 

Lapis still had control, at least. That was a good sign.

 

Steven drew closer to the hair-portal, once Malachite had settled down. He stretched his hand out, to touch the fusion's head and enter Malachite's mindscape – but paused. Steven held himself back, nervous, and drew away, only to float back to the threshold time and time again. After the fifth attempt, he realized his fear, and drew away. Malachite didn't notice him, trapped in an endless mental tug-of-war between Lapis and Jasper. As Steven hid behind a large chunk of dream-debris (looked like... One of Amethyst’s junk piles?), Malachite bucked and strained against her invisible chains, and she growled to what she thought was a black, empty sea.

 

The first night, Steven just watched, until he awoke.


	2. II

On the second night, Steven crossed the threshold.

 

He fell through the mass of white hair, just as he had the last time he'd entered Malachite's green-tinged mental landscape. He hit the “ground” with a quiet splash, groaning softly. He looked around, only to see... not much of anything, really. Steven rose to his feet, and scratched his head, puzzled. He didn't expect it to be this deserted – last time, Lapis was incredibly close.

“Guess a fusion of two really smart gems _would_ have a big brain... I'll have to look around,” he said.

Steven poked around in Malachite's head, wandering. As far as he could tell, the mindscape was almost composed almost entirely of this watery expanse, or at least that was all he could access by himself. Recalling how Jasper and Lapis had both ended up under the water the last time he'd come around, Steven looked down – and vaguely, just barely, he could make out the silhouettes of doors deep beneath the water's surface. They were various shapes and sizes, and though it was hard to tell through the greenish water, the doors appeared to be... color-coded? Some were a deep blue, and others looked orange. They had to be linked to Lapis and Jasper, respectively.

“Garnet mentioned something about fusion being a way to cooperate and open up to your partner,” Steven muttered, “so maybe it's all segmented and restricted because Malachite's built from distrust?”

He shrugged, and pressed on ahead, scanning both the surface's horizon and the underwater area for signs of either of Malachite's composite gems. Steven wanted to find Lapis, certainly, but he remembered the way Jasper glared at him when he met  _her_ , during his last visit. He had to be ready to bolt, just in case the invader gem found him – the last thing he wanted to find out was what happened if he got hurt while he was in someone else's mindscape.

It was all quite... eerie. Unsettling. There was nothing to see but the expanse of water, or the swaying shapes of doors and corridors below him, nothing to hear but the soft  _splish-splash_ of his steps cutting through the dead silence. Normally, Steven would do  _something_ to occupy the space – sing, hum, talk to himself, cleverly quip to an inanimate object personified for the sole purpose of companionship in a lonesome, wet void,  _something_ – but even if Steven had overcome his nervousness in coming into Malachite's mind, he certainly  _hadn't_ overcome his fear of alerting Jasper to his presence... Or worse, causing Lapis to lose her concentration. If Jasper was able to wrestle control away from Lapis, and could do as she pleased with Malachite... Steven shivered at the idea.

_I hope Lapis is alright_ , he thought to himself, passing over another group of doors.  _Malachite looked restless last night, I hope that doesn't mean it's getting harder to keep her in check...._ Steven paused, working his hands through his hair as he realized his distinct  _lack_ of a plan.

_Oh man, what am I gonna do when I_ find _Lapis, even? Gah, I can't cause her to lose control..!_

Steven shook his head, bringing his hands to his sides. He clenched his fists. He was a Crystal Gem, and he looked sternly into the greenish, watery distance. The... very large, very empty, green-tinged, soggy distance. It was kind of intimidating, sure, but he could do this! Whatever 'this' was.

“I've gotta start going to sleep with plans,” he said, and pressed on ahead.

 

…

 

It was hard to distinguish time, in the mindscape. At the same time, it was hard to gauge the time Steven spent wandering the water because he was asleep, and this was  _technically_ a dream – an idea reinforced by the seemingly infinite spaces he wandered – but Steven felt like he had been walking for hours without any sign of either one of Malachite's composite gems. He was about ready to give up, but as he wondered how he could trigger his own awakening, he heard a strained grunt from up ahead.

“Lapis..?” he asked the air.

Steven moved towards the sounds slowly, not wanting to startle – and still uncertain about what he should say. He wasn't even sure if there was anything  _to_ say, until he got close enough to confirm that the source of the noise was in fact Lapis Lazuli. Steven was behind her, and he crouched down quietly to observe and think.

Lapis struggled. She was always struggling here, at least to some degree or another. She tugged at the water-wrought chains around her hands, groaning as the chains pulled back hard. Jasper was trying to wrestle control away from her, and it appeared the invader gem had mustered more strength than usual to do so. Steven couldn't tell from his position, but Lapis' eyes were shut tight from focus, and as the blue figure yanked her arms back, she grunted again – partially from effort, partially from pain. She felt her shoulders aching, and her legs trembled as Lapis Lazuli fought to stay standing. She ground her teeth together, pulling at the chains.

“I... told you, Jasper!” Lapis said, her voice trembling, “You.. we... aren't going anywhere!”

The bucking of the chains from beneath was the only reply Steven could see. He'd interacted with Jasper just enough to understand some approximation of the response. It wasn't kind.

“No! Not as long as I'm here. We'll stay at the bottom of this planet's ocean forever!”

Another yank, Steven saw. The chains rattled as best they could, considering they were made of water.

Lapis struggled, her whole body shaking. Her wings unfurled from her gem as the eternal prisoner took a grounded stance. Her wings flapped once, then twice. Even from his position behind her, Steven could see Lapis' chest heaving. Her gem was glowing.

“I won't...” she began. Lapis drew closer to the ground, slightly. Her legs looked ready to give.

Steven looked on, terrified. He was scared that he might be witnessing the end of Lapis' hold on Malachite, and he felt helpless. Here she was, fighting Jasper all on her own, and even though he was only a few feet away here, he couldn't do anything to assist her. He remained silent, as much as it hurt.

“I won't let you...” Lapis' wings kept flapping as she shook. She wanted to scream, wanted to give up, wanted to just give in and _rest_ , already – but she couldn't. She wouldn't, not under any circumstances. She wouldn't be taken advantage of again, wouldn't be prisoner to anyone but herself. And aside from all of that, Lapis Lazuli had someone to fight for.

Her wings paused their constant beating, and for but a moment, Lapis' body tensed up. The shaking stopped, and in one solid movement, driven by the heavy movement of her wings, Lapis jumped – no,  _flew_ – and drew Malachite's chains over her head. Lapis Lazuli cried out.

“I won't let you hurt Steven!”

There was a muffled sound from underneath the water's surface. Steven heard it less clearly than Lapis could have, but it sounded like something had been slammed into a wall – That something being Jasper was a safe bet. The surface of the water rippled as though a stone had been thrown into it at Lapis' position, and as the ripples passed beneath Steven... the scene grew quiet.

Lapis fell to the ground, roughly. Mere moments after her feet hit the water's surface her legs buckled underneath her, and the willful gem went to her knees, aching arms slack. That took a lot out of her, but if nothing else, Jasper would be out of commission for at least a couple of hours – enough time to catch her breath and shift Malachite into a better position for the water to bury. Lapis gasped for air, her head slumped. Steven wanted to cry out to her, hug her, praise her – but he couldn't. He couldn't muster the courage to go to her now, he didn't want to risk Lapis losing control after that. It ate at him, it truly did, but he could only stay and watch Lapis rest.

 

The second night, Steven was just glad she was alright.


	3. III

On the third day, Steven went to Pearl.

 

Steven had woken up later than usual, that morning, and by the time he had eaten and gotten ready for the day it was already the afternoon. A note on the fridge from Garnet explained that she and Amethyst had gone out to search the Kindergarten for any remaining Cluster experiments and would be back late that night – meaning that Pearl would be around at home in case he needed anything. Steven found her on the front porch, leaning against the railing. Pearl was staring wistfully, looking down to the coast as the waves gently rolled across the sand. Steven saw her fiddling with a freshly picked rose, twirling it between her fingers absentmindedly. He gently tapped her on the back.

“Pearl?”

The lanky gem squeaked as she was jolted out of her thoughts, dropping the rose – before quickly catching it with her other hand. She turned, surprised.

“Oops... Sorry, Pearl. Are you okay?”

“Ah, Steven...” Pearl straightened up, turning around to face him. She very gingerly set the flower aside. “I'm fine, I was just... thinking. Erm.. you look bothered Steven, is everything alright?”

“Uh... Kind of? Sorta? No, not really... It's about Lapis.”

“Oh. Have you been meeting her in your dreams again?”

Steven sat against the railing of the porch, settled by Pearl's leg. He nodded slowly.

“I see...” Pearl sat beside him, getting down closer to his height. “What happened?”

He took a deep breath. Pearl turned her head to pay close attention as Steven began.

“I've been trying to go and talk to her the past couple of nights, but I keep getting scared and not knowing what to do! First I was scared of even approaching Malachite, then when I finally got in and found Lapis I was too scared of breaking her concentration to talk to her, because she looked exhausted and she had just fought Jasper for control again and I think she's convinced she has to sacrifice herself for me – but it's harder to solve that than it was with you and Connie because she's at the bottom of the sea and Jasper's trying to overthrow her – and I don't know what to _do_ because I really want to help! I promised Lapis I'd come back for her on the ship but I wasn't able to before it crashed and now she's all alone down there and I can't even help her stay strong against Jasper and, and, and, and–”

“Breathe, Steven. You've been gesturing a lot.” 

Steven took a hard gasp of air. “Thanks, Pearl,” he said.

“–and I don't know what to do about this, but I don't want to give up, even if Lapis keeps telling me to. I don't want anyone to think they have to die for me or anything like that! Also I keep dreaming that we end up saving Lapis and end up with her, Jasper, and Peridot as new Crystal Gems and while I like the idea of Lapis living with us Jasper scares me and Peridot's... weird.”

Pearl made a face at that last part, and then paused. She touched her fingers to her mouth as she processed everything – well, almost everything – Steven was saying. He leaned against her, quiet and visibly upset by all this. Which Pearl understood, to some degree. She was hardly the biggest fan of Lapis Lazuli, but she and Steven were friends – and the past few weeks had been rough on all of them. When she knew what to say, she gently placed her hand on Steven's head.

“I'm not sure what to say about that last part. But Steven, what's important is that you're trying, and that you want to be there for Lapis. Malachite is an unstable, spiteful fusion, and as long as Lapis and Jasper are together that way it.. might not be easy to interact with her. She's likely to get frustrated with you, likely to shut you out like she did before.” Steven visibly deflated, and Pearl ruffled his hair in response before continuing.

“However... I think if you try to talk to her the way you've talked to me, or to Amethyst, or to Connie, it will be alright in the end. You'll get through to her. Rose... Rose would be so proud of you for this – I remember she made the same efforts for all of us, back during the war.”

“She did!?”

Pearl nodded, her eyes closing in recollection. “She did. It was what made her so special – the way she cared so deeply for those around her. I don't think there was a single gem in our army that your mother hadn't tried to do something for.” She opened her eyes, and looked into Steven's.

“...Pearl?”

“You have a lot more than just Rose's gem, Steven. If you keep trying, I'm sure you'll get through to Lapis somehow.”

Steven pressed a hand against his gem, and nodded. “...What should I do about her wanting to sacrifice herself for me? What... What did mom tell you to get you to stop risking yourself?”

Pearl froze. Her expression softened as she looked back towards the sea, and she smiled weakly.

 

“What did you tell Connie and I, Steven?”


	4. III - Part II

On the third night, Steven spoke.

 

Pearl had explained the situation to Garnet and Amethyst when they returned from their Cluster hunting that night, and after a pep-talk from the duo, Steven fell asleep with conviction. He'd keep pressing, and get through to her. He didn't hesitate to enter Malachite's mane, and he realized that thought was key in his dreams: With his mind dead-set on Lapis, he saw her mere moments after he arrived – and as he thought about it, Steven realized that he'd finally found Lapis last night after worrying about how he would keep her from losing control.

Lapis Lazuli was sitting on her knees, slumped over, when Steven found her. Her arms were flexing, but it appeared that after last night Jasper had retreated to lick her wounds and muster the strength for another mental assault. She had a forlorn look on her face as she stared into the water beneath her. Steven was coming up in front of her, and the eternal prisoner hadn't noticed.

“Lapis?” he said. Steven's voice was gentle – he didn't want to alarm. “I'm here again.”

She blinked, and her head rose to meet the sound of his voice. She grimaced. Steven just couldn't leave her alone – not even when she'd asked him to time and time again, even while she was here doing all of this for his sake! She sat up, and glared at him.

“Steven! I thought I told you to stay away, and leave me here!?”

He raised his hands, displaying no ill will. “You did. But I'm not going to listen!”

“Why not!?”

“Because, Lapis!” Steven drew closer, sitting on his knees in front of her. “Because we're beach summer fun buddies and friends and I'm not just going to leave you here alone!”

“I don't want you here!” Lapis screamed, and a wave rose up from below, crashing over Steven and blowing him backwards. He yelped, before shakily making his way back towards her.

“I won't leave you down here without anyone else!”

“Shut up and _leave_ , Steven! Let me do this for you in _peace_!” Lapis whipped the chains from her arms across the surface of the water, and sent a series of waves towards him, glaring.

Steven noticed a roaring sound behind him, and realized a whirlpool had opened. Lapis planned on blowing him out of Malachite's mind, but the waves she sent were thin. He summoned his shield, and pushed forward against the tide, each crash of the waves pushing against him.

“I promised that I'd come back for you, Lapis! And... and maybe I didn't get the chance to make good on it on the ship, but I'm going to find you and help you! And in the meanwhile–”

“There isn't going to _be_ a meanwhile!” Lapis shot a spear of water at her friend. Her voice was cracking.

Steven deflected it, a stern look in his eyes. Lapis' eyes caught his, and she stopped in her tracks.

Lapis Lazuli slumped down again, looking to the water below her as Steven recalled his shield and walked to her. He put a hand on her head, and stroked her hair softly.

“Wh.. what?” she stammered.

“Lapis. Look at me.”

Lapis looked. Steven was smiling at her, warmly.

“In the meanwhile, if I can't get to you and make good on that promise, I'm going to make sure you have a friend. I won't leave you alone.”

“Nngh...” Lapis' arms strained against her chains. She chastised herself, in her head. All of her efforts to get rid of Steven weakened her hold – now she was paying for it, even if Jasper _was_ recovering from last night. “You can't help me,” she said, defeated. “I'm the only one who can keep us here...”

“Yeah, but you don't have to do it alone!”

“What are you talking about? I'm doing this for _you_ , by the way!”

“You don't have to sacrifice yourself, Lapis...” Steven sat beside his friend. “Even if the work is hard, it's easier if you've got someone on your side, isn't it? Tell me if I'm a strain on your concentration, but... If I can make this a bit easier for you by keeping you company, I'll do the best I can!”

Lapis... paused. She looked at him. “You'd... You'd do that for me?” she asked.

“Of course! I'm asleep, technically, so it's the least I can do. We can talk about anything you want!”

“...Why?”

“Because you're my friend, and you're one of the bravest people I know! I want to help you however I can, Lapis. I really mean that!”

Lapis' expression softened, and, though it was very weak, for the first time in Steven's memory... Lapis Lazuli smiled. It was a very soft, subtle affair, but her lips turned upwards as her eyes shut. It only lasted a few seconds – but Steven's heart leaped at the sight.

“Well... I. I.. _guess_ that's okay, if I can't stop you.”

Steven grinned. “Then that's that! How should we start? Anything on your mind?”

“How did you _get_ here?”

 

The third night, Steven told Lapis about dreams.


	5. IV

On the fourth night, Steven gave her company.

 

It was easier for him to find Lapis this time, now that he had a few nights of practice – and now that Lapis was ready and open to him being there. Steven crossed the threshold of Malachite's mane, and splashed down into the fusion's mindscape as easily as he would enter the Big Donut. Lapis was only a few feet away (which was a relief, since it saved a lot of time), but Steven was dismayed to see her state of being, that night.

Lapis was exhausted – it was obvious from the sight of her. She had collapsed to her knees and was gasping, struggling to keep her arms above the water. Her eyes were shut tight, and she could hardly speak when she heard Steven approach, let alone turn to look at him.

“Lapis! Are... are you okay? What's wrong?” he asked.

“Steven! Steven I... Jasper's taken a– a different approach, she's trying to wear me down...” Lapis groaned, pulling back again. If she was made of weaker stuff, her shoulders would've dislocated.

“I can't...” she gasped, “I can't talk, or... move much more than this. There's no point in staying, you should just go...”

Lapis didn't hear Steven respond. She just heard the light _splish splash splish_ of his feet on the water's surface near her. For a moment, she thought he was leaving, but the _plop_ of something sizable next to her confused her. As did the sensation of something warm leaning against her side.

“Wh.. what..?”

“I told you, Lapis! I'm not leaving you to fight alone.”

“But–“

“No butts that aren't ours sitting here! You don't have to talk or anything, you just focus.” Lapis felt the warmth beside her shift. She figured it was Steven's head – he must've smiled. “I'll be right here with you, as long as I can be.”

“Nnngh... Nn.” Lapis grunted, straining against her chains, and nodded.

“I can just talk to you if you want,” Steven said, “like back when you were in that mirror! Is it too much of a strain to listen? Oh, uh, nod yes or no to answer?”

Lapis nodded.

“Oh,” he replied. “I'll just be here then. Do you think a massage would help?”

Lapis tried to shrug – but winced halfway through the motion.

“I'll take that as a yes then.”

Steven rose – Lapis briefly felt... sad? She missed the feeling of affectionate contact with someone else, even if it had only been for a moment – and she heard him move behind her. There was the softest clicking she'd ever heard (his knuckles, perhaps? So polite.), and then the warmth of contact returned. Lapis shivered – not because Steven's hands were cold, because they were nowhere near chilly, but because they were _warm_ and _soft_ and _kind_ , and these were things Lapis Lazuli hadn't had in quite a long time.

She sighed as he worked his hands over her aching shoulders, kneading and rubbing them in circles. Lapis tugged at the chains again, and Steven moved to her upper back, working around her gem. It felt... nice. Very nice, in fact, and as Steven worked quietly the prisoner gem could feel her back and shoulders loosening. They still hurt – from the effort she exerted that instant – but the pain became just a little more bearable. The only problem was that Lapis wanted to stop fighting and enjoy it fully, but Steven's hands stopped just in time.

“Better?” he asked.

Lapis nodded.

“Not too distracting?”

Lapis paused. Honestly, it _was_ too distracting, but only because of how _nice_ it was. She tossed her head back and forth, to indicate her answer as 'Kinda'.

“Okay. I'll stop for now, then.”

She felt the warmth leave her back – but not before a thumb kindly stroked her gem – and heard Steven move back to her side. He sat down and leaned into her once more. If Lapis Lazuli could expend the effort at the time, she'd have smiled. She thought about her position during a brief moment where Jasper's attack had relented: If she remembered their relative heights correctly, then maybe she could just sort of let her head droop to the side and... maybe...

She felt empty air, and cursed herself for wanting.

But then, Steven shifted. He must've gotten onto his knees, because the warmth of his body rose slightly to meet her head. The child – no, her _friend_ – had noticed what she was doing, had realized what she wanted, and had worked to make it happen. Lapis rested her head against his, feeling his soft hair against her cheek. She still had to strain against Jasper, and staying like this felt alien, awkward, like when she'd finally been freed from the mirror and had to readjust to her own body, but it was worth it to maintain this selfishness, as far as she was concerned. Lapis could only hope Steven would forgive her for making him shift, since he had to be less comfortable than he'd been before. She briefly wondered if he was angry, when – much to her surprise – Steven began to hum contentedly.

She didn't recognize the tune; he clearly knew it well. It was slow, and rather somber, and as new as it was, it felt like it was uniquely and totally _hers_. It helped, somehow: Despite the exhaustion, despite Jasper's cruel, needling assault from beneath them, hearing Steven hum the melody made it feel... alright. She hurt, but she could manage. She struggled, but she felt _good_ about it. The two of them stayed like that until Steven woke up, after the humming had softened and tapered out and she had to raise her head before her neck began to ache.

 

The fourth night, Steven stayed with her. Lapis was thankful for it.


	6. V

On the fifth night, Steven helped.

 

It was easier, for Lapis to bear the load of her angry, tortured fusion with Jasper, when Steven arrived that night. The invader gem's antagonizing had settled down after she realized that it wasn't beating Lapis' will. It made for an easy day – though the relative lack of pain made Lapis realize just how much she missed Steven, when he wasn't there. It made the days all the more lonely, but at least it gave her something to wait for and cherish.

He waved to her, smiling at the sight of her not having to struggle and fight two nights in a row. She smiled back  at Steven , sitting down to meet him  halfway . He  ran to her and sat beside her – he must have realized just how much she enjoyed the contact. He commented on it, after a little while.

“You really liked this last night, didn't you?”

“...Yes. It was... It was nice. I'm sorry, it wasn't too much trouble, was–“

“Not at all! I'm happy to help, Lapis! It's not as hard to stay in control tonight, right?”

“Yeah. Thank you for staying with me last night.”

“No prob, bo– Er, Lapis.” Steven paused. “I... Hmm.”

Steven stopped talking, and looked away, as though he were deep in thought. Lapis was concerned. Was he mad? Was he about to tell her off for something? She wracked her brain to figure out where she might have gone wrong, certain that there was  _ something _ causing–

“Lapis, will you tell me where you are?”

“Oh,” she said.

“Oh?”

“Oh, uh... N.. no. No. Listen, Steven, I appreciate you spending time with me, but... I can't risk you getting hurt by Jasper. And I _really_ don't want to end up a Crystal Gem prisoner again.”

“We can handle Jasper! And... I don't think they would take you prisoner.” Steven looked somber.

“Still, I... I have to keep us down here. It's the only way to be sure!”

“I don't think that's true, Lapis. You don't have to tell me, if you want, but we're gonna keep searching until we find you! I promised you I'd come back, remember?”

“I... Still, I don't want the Crystal Gems to–“

“Lapis, I don't think they think of you as an enemy anymore!” Steven looked at her, teary-eyed. “I... don't know what happened to get you in that mirror – and I don't expect you to tell me now. But... I know you're good, even if you were unlucky and ended up in a bad place. And after you stopped Jasper, I think they see that too! You could be one of us, once you're free and Jasper's dealt with.”

“One of... you? You mean a Crystal Gem?”

“If you wanted to!”

“But I don't... I never even cared about this planet. I still don't, really – I just care about you.”

“I think Amethyst and Garnet would let that slide. Pearl might be a bit of a stickler, but... I think she sees too much of herself in you, maybe? She'd come around since she knows you protect me, though!”

“I... don't know what to say to that.”

Steven smiled, just a little bit. “You've got time to think about it, if you won't say where you are.”

“Right... Steven, can we not talk about this right now?”

“Oh.. Alright. Sure. What should we talk about, then?”

“I don't know? Uh... What did you do toda– Argh!”

Lapis was yanked forward, all of a sudden. Jasper had tugged at her all of a sudden, and used the surprise to launch a new offensive, as far as she could tell. She scrambled to her feet, pulling back. Steven, knocked back by Lapis' sudden movement, called out to her.

“What happened!?”

“Jasper's making another play! I wasn't... I didn't expect it to start so suddenly!” The force of the sudden yanking and pulling on her chains had thrown Lapis off, and she was sliding along the surface of the green-tinged water as she mounted a resistance. The blue gem dug her heels into the 'ground', unfurling and beating her wings to pull back.

Steven ran to her as she skidded forward, and – much to Lapis' surprise – threw his arms around her waist. He dug his own feet into the surface below them, and grunted as he tried to pull Lapis back (or at the very least, keep her from going forward). Lapis' wings beat unevenly for a moment, before resuming their pace. She worked with him, and soon enough their movements began to synchronize. Not anywhere near closely enough to trigger a fusion – which would've been disastrous – but closely enough that it helped Lapis to maintain control. Through his exertions, he spoke to her, here and there.

“You can do it, Lapis!” he'd say. “You can fight her off!”

“I'm right here; I won't let you go down!” he said.

“You're more than strong enough to shake her off!” he insisted.

 

…

 

It took the pair what felt like an hour or so to finally fight off Jasper's mental offensive. It ended when Lapis (with Steven's assistance) worked up the strength to yank back the chains that bound Malachite's composite gems together, stunning Jasper just enough for the dominant gem to regain her footing and maintain a balance. When the deed was finally done, Steven laughed, lying on the ground.

“Why... why are you laughing?” Lapis asked.

“Because... Because I didn't think we'd stop skidding, for a while there!”

His laughter started to subsist, and Steven got back to his feet. Lapis was still standing, catching her breath, and she couldn't decide if she was puzzled or angry that he was handling this all so loosely. And yet, before she could even manage to get a word out about it, Steven walked up to her from the front and... he hugged her.

“Sorry Lapis, I'm just glad we did it!”

“I... Wh... Huh?”

His embrace was tight, warm, gentle despite the pressure. She was at a loss for words – partially because of how sudden this was, partially because of how  _ good _ it felt. Lapis let her arms fall over Steven's shoulders, using her forearms to pull against Jasper. This was... nice. She had come to terms with the fact that she enjoyed this sort of close contact from Steven – it was  _ so much better _ than the way Jasper roughly grabbed her and moved her around like a doll, the few times the invader gem had held her. There was something pleasant about Jasper's touch in  _ theory _ , but the lack of respect, the sense that Lapis was a tool in her hands rather than a person... It soured it.

Lapis Lazuli dimly realized that she desperately craved affection and attention.

She set the thought aside, and a new, padlocked blue door appeared in the depths under the surface of the ocean that was Malachite's mental landscape. Perhaps, once all this was over – if Steven was right and she  _ was _ accepted into his home – she would revisit the idea and look into it. In the meantime, however, she merely leaned into Steven's embrace. When she thought about it, he wasn't wrong – their skidding together  _ was _ kind of amusing, in an “if this isn't dealt with soon, everything will be terrible” sort of way. She was glad that they managed, together.

 

The fifth night,  Steven warmed her. Lapis wondered about her future.


	7. VI

On the sixth night, Steven talked to her.

 

It had almost been a week, since Steven had started his attempts to contact Lapis in his sleep, and when Steven arrived in Malachite's mind that night, it was as though his visits were the most mundane events in the world. He arrived near Lapis, and, since Jasper – likely shocked by how much  _ stronger _ Lapis had become over these past few days – had quieted down to lick yesterday's fresh wounds, they exchanged warm greetings as Steven moved towards his friend. They hugged, much to Lapis' joy, and they sat together, content to just talk. Not about anything serious, but just about anything that came to their minds.

“Really?” Steven said, “That's so cool!”

“I guess it is, isn't it? I don't know how I feel about humans, but... this planet's ocean has things I see a point in protecting. The sea life I've seen is... pretty. It's nice.”

“Oh man, we'll have to go to an aquarium once we find you and split you and Jasper up. You'd love it!”

“...What's an aquarium?”

“It's... It's like a big building with lots of tanks of water, they're all full of fish and stuff, and there's a bunch of stuff you can read and listen to to learn more about the fish you can see?”

“So it's like a fish jail..?”

“No!” Steven paused. “Well, not usually, and when it is people fight really hard to free the fish who're in trouble. It's usually a place where fish and stuff are taken care of, in case the wild is too dangerous!”

“But isn't that how the wild works? Survival of the fittest?”

Steven thought about that.

“Steven?” Lapis asked.

“It is, sorta, but humans aren't always the biggest fans of that! Partially because sometimes, since we're the fittest things that aren't gem-related, we can end up hurting things by accident. We try and keep things from going extinct, when we can and people know to do it.”

“...Really?”

“Yeah! Some humans could care less, but lots of us really care about the Earth! Some people work their whole lives to protect parts of it the best they can, kind of like the Crystal Gems.”

“Hmm... I think I like that.”

The starry expression in Steven's eyes couldn't begin to explain how happy he was to hear that.

“...Steven?”

“You found two things you liked about Earth, and that's _awesome_.”

“...Oh.”

Lapis drew herself up, putting her arms around her knees. Steven shuffled over to maintain their skin-to-skin contact (which Lapis was embarrassed to admit she enjoyed as much as she did, the previous night). She hadn't really considered the idea,  but maybe she  _ did _ like parts of this miserable ball of rock and water? It produced Steven, so it couldn't be  _ all _ bad, really...

“Oh! Lapis, that reminds me!” Steven bounced in place, recalling something he'd clearly wondered about earlier that day. “You said you've been watching the things around you on the sea-floor, right?”

“Yes? We were just talking about that.”

“Have you seen any green, striped guys that look kind of like me, down there?”

Lapis looked at him blankly. “What?”

“The– Wait, you don't know what a watermelon is, do you... Uh...” Steven stopped and thought, for a little bit. Lapis wondered what he was talking about, until he resumed.

“Okay,” he said, “There's a kind of big, green fruit – fruit are things that grow on trees or vines usually, that humans eat, that are sweet or sour and nice in the summer – called a watermelon! A long while ago, waaaaaay before I met you, I kind of... accidentally... grew a bunch with gem powers from my mom that I didn't know I had.”

“How–”

“It's a long story. Anyway, so I grew a bunch of melons and they ended up coming to life while looking like little green me's – there was only one that I had with me at the time, since I'd sold them around the town, and the one that stayed was named Baby Melon and he was a hero – and the Melon Stevens ended up attacking people!”

“Really?”

Steven nodded. “We realized that they'd always work to protect me, and the gems ended up fighting the army of them on the beach! It went... not great, so Baby Melon – bless his melon soul – sacrificed himself to stop the carnage.”

“It sacrificed itself?”

“Yeah. He hit me, to make all the other melons fight _him_. They realized what they'd done when they squashed one of their own kind...” Steven looked into the distance, wistfully.

Lapis  followed his glance, confused. He was staring at nothing. “Uh..?”

“Anyway,” Steven resumed after his dramatic pause, “I asked, because the Melon Stevens all went off into the distance when I commanded them to leave and reflect on their mistakes. Some of them went into the ocean – and I always wonder what happened to those guys.”

“I don't think we've seen them, down where we are, but... I guess I'll tell you if I see some?”

“Awesome! Thanks a bunch, Lapis!”

“It's... fine. Hey, Steven?”

“Yeah?”

“There's one problem with that aquarium plan.”

“Oh!? What is it?” Steven looked dismayed.

Lapis... looked away from him. This was embarrassing to admit.

“Lapis?”

“I don't know how to read Earth languages.”

 

The sixth night, they talked about books and fish and music.


	8. VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's take a feels trip!

On the seventh night, Steven sang to her.

 

When Lapis saw Steven arrive that night, he looked ecstatic. He ran to her, grinning and bouncing and holding an unfamiliar-looking instrument in his hand. It was long, and oddly-shaped, and it had more strings than Lapis had expected. Apparently, that was an 'electric guitar'. Who knew?

“Lapis!” Steven cried out, “Lapis it worked! We can do it!”

Lapis Lazuli smiled. She was hoping it might work out like this.

The plans were laid out last night, when Steven began to yawn. They had both realized by then, that exhaustion while Steven was in Malachite's mindscape would prompt him to fall asleep – and return to the waking world for the day. While the pair discussed music – or rather, while Steven gushed about his love for music and Lapis recalled fond musical memories of the past – Lapis let slip that she genuinely enjoyed the tune he hummed for her a few nights prior. Steven lit up, and revealed that it was a song he'd written about her. He plotted to, while he moved towards Malachite's mane out of his dreams, see if he could steal a guitar away and bring it to her. Lapis had been moved by his willingness to work for her comfort, but she hadn't _really_ expected the plot to succeed.

And yet, Steven had done it. Here he was, smiling and excited to play for her, eager to share. Lapis couldn't stop smiling either, even as she shifted into a position where she could listen closely and still resist Jasper. Hearing the melody hummed was so nice before, she could hardly imagine how nice it would be to hear the whole thing. Steven sat beside her, tuning the dream-guitar. He strummed it every once in a while as he spoke.

“So I wrote more of this recently, after you came back and I needed to think about stuff.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah! I'd written the first part after you left, right before your message to Earth.”

“And it's all about me?”

“Mmhm!” Steven blushed, just a little bit, and looked at the strings as he spoke. “It's a little embarrassing I guess, since it's all about the way I feel about you? So... Y'know.”

“That's so sweet...”

Steven strummed the instrument a few times, listening closely – Lapis noticed that he shut his eyes for this. It took focus of his own, it appeared – before nodding to himself. He looked at her and smiled. She returned the expression as he cleared his throat and began.

_“[She was trapped in a mirror,](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrZRgeGznQM)_

_[and it couldn't be clearer:](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrZRgeGznQM) _

_[She wanted to leave this place,](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrZRgeGznQM) _

_[and get herself back in space...](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrZRgeGznQM)”_

Steven sang, and Lapis watched and listened intently. He sang about her, and her escape, and – her return, that had to have been the newer part. Lapis Lazuli shut her eyes and immersed herself in the music, grinning. This, this was sweet. It was almost... sad, when she thought about it: She had found the one person on this planet who seemed to genuinely care about her, and she left him – only to come back the unwilling guide of a pair who wanted him dead, and then trap herself in a secret place, deep under the sea where he couldn't reach her.

And yet, at the same time, Lapis felt that this song – this song and all the emotion behind it – it justified her actions. She wanted to protect this boy, who cared enough to press through her rage and the wishes of his guardians, just to get through to her: This boy who freed her and healed her and, even after she caused him so much struggle, promised to return to help her yet again. Steven did it all without thanks, and that... that, the faith in her that led him to do so much for her? Lapis Lazuli appreciated that more than she could ever begin to explain.

 

Lapis began to hum, and then she was pulled down under the water.

 

Steven's playing stopped in an instant, and he jumped to try and grab her. His hands got there seconds too late, and as Lapis opened her eyes – realizing her mistake in forgetting her duty, even for those few moments – she met Steven's distraught eyes. She heard him, muffled through the water: He was calling out to her. She gasped, and began to fight against the chain pulling her down into the green seas of her and Jasper's mutual distrust.


	9. VII - Part II

As Steven yelled, and saw Lapis' eyes open, he beat his fists against the surface of the water that separated him from his friend. The last string he had strummed on the guitar behind him finished its vibration, and as that final note died out, there was only silence in the landscape of Malachite's spiteful mind. He waited there, watching, pleading silently for Lapis' return, even after he saw her form disappear in the dark waters below.

There was a stillness in the air, and then, suddenly? A change in the air pressure, brought on like the crack of a whip against the skin of a bare back. Steven froze. He heard heavy splashes from behind him – slow, shaky, as though their source hadn't stood on solid ground in at least a week. He slowly got to his feet, stepping forward, then to the side, then finally backwards, as he turned and saw Jasper's furious glare coming in from the distance.

“So _you're_ the reason Lapis Lazuli was so much stronger these past few days. Rose Quartz's sick runt of an experiment has been visiting in _my_ mind...”

“Jasper..!”

The invader gem moved slowly, her heavy, malicious footsteps causing the water beneath her to ripple. Chains rattled from her wrists and ankles, tugging at her, holding her back as best they could. As far as Steven was concerned, the fact that she hadn't broken them yet was a good sign – it meant Lapis was fighting to return, just beneath him. The youngest of the Crystal Gems just hoped that she could regain control in time.

“So what have you been up to, Rose? I hope you aren't _bonding_ with my captor. You really mustn't remember anything if you are – I think we both know her old crimes.”

“I... I don't know what you're talking about!”

“...Of course. Must be part of whatever sick and twisted plan produced you. You really don't know what Lapis Lazuli did, back during the war?”

“No!”

Jasper grinned wide, letting her teeth – or would  _ fangs _ be more accurate? – reflect her hatred for the gem that kept her prisoner deep under the water. “Well then, let me...  _ educate _ you, before I beat you to a pulp and crush that gem of yours. You see, Lapis Lazuli–“

“ _No!_ ”

Jasper paused. “What..?”

“No!” Steven cried, “I don't want to hear it from anyone but her! I don't... I don't _care_ what Lapis did! She's my friend and I'm not going to leave her!”

“...Friend?” Jasper began to giggle. She brought a hand to her forehead, and ran another through her hair as she began to laugh. The invader began to cackle madly. “Friend!? You're calling that _criminal_ your _friend_!? Rose, Runt, _whatever_ created that thought, that's _rich_!”

“It's _true_!”

Jasper couldn't help but laugh, harder than she'd laughed in a long, long time. Here she had Rose Quartz – or something that existed  _ with _ or  _ through _ her – at her mercy, powerless to stop her, and the abomination was suddenly defending a war criminal, calling her its  _ friend _ ? Lapis Lazuli had reported to Yellow Diamond that the Crystal Gems had locked her cracked gem away in a mirror and used her as a tool for what she'd done! And now, for the fleshspawn of their leader to call that tool's power source not an ally, but a  _ friend _ !? The concept was too beautifully ridiculous.

“Oh, Rose... If nothing else, your little project is funny.”

“Th..ank you?”

“I wonder how funny it'll be to _break_ it?”

“...Eep.”

Steven began to back away forward, hoping that, if nothing else, his presence could distract Jasper long enough for Lapis to return and regain control. His foot hit the guitar, and a weak note rang out. In the moment it took for him to look down at it, Jasper had picked up her pace. He didn't know how long his shield could hold out against her, not in her own (shared) mind. Not when he knew Jasper would strike to  _ kill _ , not push him away like Lapis did. Steven took a breath, and – without breaking eye contact with his would-be murderer – bent down to pick up the guitar. He only had one idea left.

 

He sang to Lapis.


	10. VII - Part III

She had grown selfish. Careless. She brought this on herself.

 

Too much of a good thing, or  _ any _ good thing taken for granted, was clearly a bad thing in the end. That was Lapis Lazuli's conclusion as she was dragged under, further away from Steven, where he couldn't see her. She had let herself enjoy the music too much, let herself be fooled into believing that something  _ nice _ could happen in her long, painful life. It was probably karma – Steven had explained the concept before – the idea that her past actions brought present consequences. Fitting, all considered.

Steven couldn't see through the depths because this wasn't his mind. Jasper couldn't, because Lapis was the one in control of the water, and the one keeping them under the sea.  _ She _ , however, could see perfectly down here – even if she couldn't quite get back yet. She saw Steven freeze, and turn – turned her head and her gem pulsed cold. Jasper was there, Jasper was moving towards Steven, and she looked  _ furious _ . The only good thing about this was that the chains were still on her, that Jasper was still slowed down: It meant that Malachite was still stuck under the ocean's weight. It meant that Lapis could still fix this, if she could just make it back.

She willed her wings to materialize, blue in the deep green ocean of her and Jasper's shared mind. Lapis beat them, pulling against the chains with her body  as she passed by another series of doors down in the deep . Jasper had capitalized on her moment of vulnerability, if she was up on the water's surface and walking, it meant the invader gem had control – or enough to keep pulling Lapis deeper, anyway. But not so much that Jasper had  _ control _ , not if the chains were still there.  She had stopped, it looked like she was laughing – which meant there was a chance. So Lapis Lazuli beat her wings and struggled, hoping, pleading that Steven could hold out until she made it back to him.

Jasper had picked up the pace. And while Lapis didn't know what would happen if Steven died while visiting Malachite's mind, the idea of witnessing  _ any _ outcome was terrible enough that the ocean gem wanted to scream, furiously working her way back to the surface.  She could see Jasper slowing, but Lapis was too deep – at this rate, unless Steven ran (and even then, that wasn't guaranteed...) there was no way for her to save him.

“Steven! _Steven!_ ” Lapis cried out, desperately, from the depths.

There was no response – there couldn't be. He couldn't hear her. Jasper couldn't either, though she might have felt Lapis resisting deep below. Steven might've sang about her being better than they all thought – about not being a criminal, really – but the gem certainly didn't feel like it. She felt like a failure, through and through. A traitor to every cause, finally getting her just punishment.

Lapis kept pushing, only to see Steven freeze up by the guitar. She wished she could get through to him, tell him to run, to escape, that she was so  _ sorry _ but she would do whatever she could, as soon as she could make it back to him, and he just needed to believe in her and  _ survive _ in the meanwhile.

_ What was the line? _ , she thought.  _ My friendship comes through, subliminal..? If only... _

And yet, just as Lapis thought that, wishing that there was some way to get through to Steven, something miraculous happened. Something she never expected. Steven had picked up the guitar, was staring down  _ Jasper _ , of all gems, and wasn't moving a muscle. She couldn't hear what they had been saying on the surface, not before, but this? Somehow, this rang through clear.

 

He was singing that song. Steven was singing to  _ her _ , from up above.


	11. VII - Part IV

Lapis Lazuli shut her eyes and sang with him.

 

She beat her wings as hard as she could, and moved towards the source of the music. She didn't believe in the planet Earth, and at this point... she didn't believe in Homeworld, either. But if there was one thing, one single thing she believed in? It was  _ him _ . In Steven, the boy that believed in  _ her _ and fought to help her and that sang for her now.

She couldn't bear to look and see what was going on, but she heard Steven's singing and knew that, at least for the moment – at least as long as she could hear him – he was okay. Lapis just flew towards the strum of the guitar, singing softly to herself. She felt the chains give, and pull in her favor as she moved blindly upwards. If karma dictated her punishment, so be it. She would make up for her crimes – she'd started, she thought, in dragging Jasper down here. She would continue by saving Steven, however she had to do it. Even if she had to move this entire ocean again to manage.

Lapis felt her body aching, straining, burning in the cold water around her. The chains around her arms threatened to take her arms with them, down into the depths, but she merely shut her eyes tighter and sang louder, forcing herself upwards. Steven was still playing to her. She could do this.  No, not  _ could _ – she  _ would _ do this. For him. For herself.

Steven was right – she  _ would _ make a decent Crystal Gem, if it meant she could keep him safe.

Lapis Lazuli didn't stop until she felt herself breaking through the surface. She didn't stop singing the whole time, even after her voice went hoarse from the effort and she just squeaked and gasped out the melody, as loudly as she could. Steven was still playing as Jasper screamed in rage ahead of them both, as she was pulled to her hands and knees, then dragged along the water's surface until she slipped back underneath. Steven let the last notes play out on the guitar as the two friends opened their eyes and watched Jasper go down.

Steven fell backwards, gasping for air. Lapis struggled to keep her arms held taut as she fell to her knees, in a similar state. The pair simply stayed like that, collapsed beside one another, for what felt like ages. Steven's breathing regained a normal pace after a time, and when he could move again, he crawled to Lapis' hunched, trembling body.

“Lapis..? Lapis, you did it! I knew you could–”

She sputtered through heavy breaths.

“L...apis?”

Lapis Lazuli laughed. She laughed harder than she ever had.

“Why... why are you laughing?” Steven asked.

“Because...” Lapis panted, between giggles. “Because I didn't think we'd manage, for a while there!”

H er laughter started to subsist, and  Lapis got back to his feet.  Steven was standing  now ,  still nursing h is sore throat , and he couldn't decide if he was puzzled or  scared that  s he was handling this all so loosely. And yet, before he could even manage to get a word out about it,  Lapis Lazuli walked up to h im from the front and...  s he hugged h im .

 

“Sorry Steven, I'm just glad we did it!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, okay, there are all my feelings out of the way.
> 
> I'm getting back into the swing of writing fanfic. Follow me on Tumblr (the URL's blakelocked) if you want updates for when I put more stuff out? Thanks for reading!


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